witches are evil. we will never be as 'pure' as the angels in your eyes. no matter what we do, we can never take their places. they will always be so beautiful, so 'pure', innocent, nothing they do is ever wrong. witches are plain..... wicked.

fugorf!!

Somehow, the journey back here seems so lonely... and cold. Like the time when I was living with myself, and for myself again. I detest that insecureness that I couldn't seem to shake away. And how spot-on my 6th sense always proves me. I'm not one to believe in omens. Still, my board fell just as I settled down in my room.. 3 petals dropped as I took a whiff at my roses...

Perhaps I'm ultra sensitive especially when I'm emo-ing.

lava land

I just swallowed a huge mound of fireball from that twerp of a newt or skink or whichever cold-blooded animal applicable.. and am about to spew lava and ashes (yes, expletives) aplenty .. *self-restrains*

Aahhh... honestly, I''m not feeling all too good and the same can be said bout Kaz & Stikx. Yea.. I might have asked you guys to cheer up and give me that smile, when I'm feeling all crapped up as well.. If I had pulled a long face, I suppose the situation won't get better anyway. Gotta move on.. and i understand perfectly that it takes time. Still, at least we started somewhere... by smiling.

It's not as if we did not put in as much effort as other groups. We slaved our butts off staying back and discussing for hours. Ended up with sore bodies, bloodshot eyes, and frustration-grappled minds. When we finally called it a day with our completed papers, remember how drained we felt. Nevertheless, the triumphant feeling of being able to complete those mind-boggling questions was a feeling to behold.. savoured.. and be thankful for. And the only hopes we held for the paper were to let us nail it correctly and please be merciful.

Alas, the results handed out plummeted our confidence of passing this paper. Had us cowering to a corner with the prospects of the f- word.. fail. Understandably, this is a thought too unthinkable and tough for us to bear. Still, we ought to be proud for the fact that we managed to pull off the assignment with no background whatsoever in this field. We need to be proud of the fact that we hung on together till the very end even if the end prologue was demoralizing.

Truth betold, nothing much can be done to salvage the situation now except for plenty of notes-drumming into the nougat and praying for a miraculous enormous dose of fairy good luck during the finals. Let us keep happy, so we can fight back with greater spirits... and lastly avenge in the devil's way by scratching that skink's car. (of course, if we have the heart to)

Skink, play nice. Mean-ness begets mean-ness.

Food Engineering was a breeze compared to the norms. Usually, it'd have come in the form of a big blustery wind which can develop into a ferocious storm, catching one unawares midways. Still, silly mistakes are costly and I'd like to bang ma head on the wall very much please. Why did I write automator instead of actuator? I have not the slightest idea what is an automator. I'm not pissed at myself. Kind of bewildered what made that word pop up in my nougat. Silly witch.. hehehe.

Well, the ability to laugh at one's own blunders is always a good thing. We shouldn't take life too hard at times... unless one wants to go stark raving mad? Tis I seriously doubt not.. Knowing myself as a person who easily stumbles into the depression pit by the mildest stressor, I'm doing my best not to let history be recorded down in tape and put on a lifetime replay mode.

Delving into the definition of 'self-forgiveness', I've learnt to treat myself kinder.. and slowly start to love myself again. What good would it do to keep grasping tight to the mistakes committed when the past has already slipped through the hands of time? Harsh treatments as such are intended at reducing the guilt with self-inflicted punishment. However from previous experiences, the opposite is often true where the guilt does not get unloaded and instead piles up higher as resentment ensues.

To quote Cassie, "Life is too short to be wasted on tiny details like that".

Indeed. A profound life theory stringed into simplistic alphabets, often overlooked by the supposedly-civilized living beings. Barren, arid, and often consumed by those minute details in the form of temptations of vices.. we may be surging forward in terms of material progression, but can the same be said about the intellectual values passed down to us by the great thinkers of time?

Barely a mile would we have surpassed the deep-thinking minds of Aristotle and Socrates in present times.. had they been hale and hearty, immortalising their souls and ultimately their words so endearing under the stars that witnessed each turn of the earth..

I want more bunny shirts~ *wails*

Romantic-ness

How to study laa when my table is so romantic gilerr? *grimaces*

Mocha's perched atop the table and the sweet-smelling roses look so beautiful in the beribboned bottle. Pink, champagne and red roses, all twelve in the process of blooming to their full glory. Our picture is glowering softly next to the bottle. Love songs gently playing in the background. And guess what Mocha's heart-shaped dog tag reads???

"I LOVE YOU"

........... (-_-")

Why do the sequence of events have to be so cruel? I am without my man here wey.. kns

kan nice if there's no test tomorrow? kan nice if babibu is here? kan nice if we can eat the strawberries together? kan nice if we can cuddle close through the cold night? kan nice if we can nose wub? *sighz* I can give so many more "kan if"s if I don't have to do a reality check & bludgeon myself to consciousness before I can sedar dan pasrah and see there is no point in mulling and miserable-ing.

HelloOoOoo.. you have a test tomowo laa. Geddit, puuunkiiee? wantmetosmackyourgodamnedfaceandslamittothewall?
(violence only intended for self-threatening purpose , please do not imitate anyhow, anywhere & anytime.)


*self-reflects*

I cried.

leaky cauldron ( -_-''')

*grumble grumble*

Feel like a leaky cauldron. (Erm, pipes sound a lil obscene 'ere and since I'm a strega in my imaginary world, a cauldron fits in better) Gah, you'll get what I mean if you're a coming of age homo sapien in the feminine form... guys sure have it easier. At least they squirt, not leak. And they squirt at their own will. We girls leak at our creator's mercy. *sighz*

Cuzzy dearest & his pwetty girlfriend (pic below) gave me a surprise call this afternoon to say they'd be bunking in for the night. So spunky have company, yay~ They just came down from Cameron's & surprised me with 12 roses & some own-plucked strawberries. so sweet of em.. :)

Anyways, they're snoring gently in the background now after we went mamak-ing at Al-Barkath. I'm not going back there again unless circumstances compels me to. I ordered teh tarik and the Ah Neh holy shite terrorised me with my choice. *shudderz*

Neh : Boss, nak minum ape?
spunkz : Teh tarik satu
Neh : Ok, teh tarik dengan susu lembu?
spunkz : ah... teh tarik biasa la.
Neh : Ok ok, teh tarik dgn susu lembu satu ya
spunkz : Neh, kan semua teh tarik juga dgn susu lembu....
*thinks: which part of teh tarik biasa duncha understand? pls dun traumatise me like this...*
Neh : Tak tak.. teh tarik kita dgn susu lembu. Special. Ok ya.
*sien of arguing*
spunkz : Neh... bagi satu teh tarik biasa je.
Neh : dgn susu lembu ya ya..

I would have growled, sprang at his neck and snapped it in half had cuzz not sensed the dangerous tone in my voice. Cuzz quickly dispelled him off by saying the same thing as I did and he actually understood. wat the fuuk...

After the la-teh (Hokkien: stir tea) session, we went to Mc Duh for some fries and witnessed a drunk lady throwing a fit there. Her bewildered bf couldn't bear her antics and hollered at her before dragging her away fbefore a bigger scene was made.

My my, how interesting... The guy looked sort of wimpy in the first place. However after he shouted at her, me and Chin (cuzzie's gf) thought he was pretty yeng or cool. Well, only at that particular moment la.. *Snaps back to reality* Aduh, I think I really can tapau dy. Whole day glued to watching some shippuuden episodes... jahat betuii.. addictive sial....

Today's dinner: cereals & cold milk, baked potato wedges rubbed with salt and black pepper, topped with melted cheese & mayo... heavenly~ =p

And I thought it was the peanuts..

I discovered the source of my moodlessness... it's that monthly fluctuation of hormones. Hee... I wasn't lazy without a reason after all. It's the physiological response. :) I had a tummy ache too, and initially thought the nuts were the culprits.

*aaahhh...spunky making excuses! lazeee~ *

Am not! *glares @ inner self*

*disappears in a huff*

Good riddance.. shoo~

Back to the topic, we've finally seen the last of our assignments today. Sweet.. Well, what better way to pamper myself for this occasion than by lathering myself silly with soap bubbles in the shower? tee hee hee. Now, I smell nice~ *giggles*

Mmm... spunky made peanut and old cucumber soup today. Supposed to be lotus root and peanuts but let's just say I couldn't find any. In the end, I just grabbed the old choo-choo-berr... Simmered the nuts and choo-choo-berr for 4 hours, err... maybe more. Coz the nuts were tough. I couldn't wait for the sensory evaluation part due to the fact that it's the first time I simply mix-and-match the ingredients for this soup. oH, I threw in half a carrot as well. Was worried the soup won't be sweet as I didn't put in any meat. The vegetarian mutton did add some flavour to the broth though.

If I were to give it a description, I'd say it's a very down-to-earth soup. It's not like the outspoken Tom Yam, with flavours bursting out just by us taking a whiff. Neither is it a wall-flower, like the plain soups accompanying those kon lou meen. It spoke volumes in a subtle way, touching me by surprise.. the earthen smell of the peanuts blended with the refreshing sweet taste of old cucumber. Neither overpowered each other and each was in an element of their own. Yin and yang constitudes a gentle balance in the soup: yin being the "cooling" cucumber and yang being the "heaty" peanuts.

Okay, I 'm crapping again but it sure did my tummy loads of good, kept me warm and toast in the rainy day. Cooped in my freezing cold bedroom, the soup was a good companion. Emanating warmth and mum's feel, it kept me going till the last letter I typed for the assignment.

moodless..be gone

I can't get into the mood to do my assignment.. darn. Furthermore, it's due so soon. Must prime myself up. I shall start with stoking my self-esteem. lolx.

Physical features that i like about myself

• my sepet eyes? one big one small wor... special ma..haha
• that cute round thing! ma button nose!! yes!
• le small mouth (looks small ony, can stuff my fist inside)
• moi long neck :)
• da small wrists
• them slender fingers that blogs
• oo.. da 2 tiny baby carrot stick resembling fingers. lolx
• the tooshie that hopefully does not sag or shrink
• those pins that had trained well
• the waddling feet that looks too long but ... it works, so dun care.
• the toesies that are monstrously looooong but i still love em unique-ness all the same
• the sweet-smelling crowning glory of mine, ignoring the straggly fact.

I must love myself first before i can love other people and other things. like my ASSIGNMENT. The next part is ..........

I shall take a power nap to sleep the laziness away!

Would You Be There..

A song I came across in my sister's page. It gives me kind of the old romantic love song feel... and i like the feeling. :)

flea market

I enjoy weekends, where I can amble aimlessly around Amcorp Mall, observing the knick-knacks being peddled at the flea market. Used toys, second-hand books, collectibles such as stamps, coins, past first day covers, old records that still run, old Malay cassettes, old clothing, quaint ornaments, shoes, imported slippers, food, handicrafts.. the list goes on.

I love the small crowd that gathers around each stall: the occasional small kid worming through, the old sentimental man peering over the goods with his glasses, the jovial expatriate who loves a good bargain, young ladies chattering excitedly over a pair of unique earrings... Without any of them, the atmosphere wouldn't have come alive on a lazy Sunday morning.

Still, it was but a breather from all my mundane burdens. With a heavy heart, I trudged back to the cold and lifeless cubicle... all for the next round of mindless reading, researching and typing. To tell you the truth, I abhorr them. My Sunday is not sunny anymore. To enforce the literary part of this point, it is actually pouring outside. He Who Rules The Universe certainly has a penchant for jokes, I suppose.

raw

Barely slept.. only dozed off before daylight broke and it was time to wake up for the day already. I've been living the life of a living dead, where day and night are of no difference, no significance. Work knows no hours. I concentrate when I'm able, taking slight naps in between. Ploughing through websites and journals till my eyes water, physically & mentally exhausted.

But last night, I had a chance to relax with my loved one. Still, the messed up biological clock could no longer differentiate what is resting time, what is working time. From tossing & turning to pondering imponderables on the balcony, neither had any effect on my painfully awake physical & mental self. Tumultuous thoughts kept me perturbed, adding to the turmoil.

Uncertainty hangs and echoes. Throughout the long, dark & silent night, thoughts are my only companion. Comforting thoughts they are not, thoughts that made my inner soul cringe, raw and painful... to the extent I wish I could just drop dead and not get besieged by them anymore. Choked with pain, however no release available. Like a swollen river, however impeded by boulders that had tumbled in from nowhere.

The silence of the night would be left untouched, if not broken by heavy sighs from time to time. That body so close to me, yet so distant... drifted too far away in dreamland. I could only look longingly and stroke the facial features ever so gently.. a soft murmur escaped from the heart unheard, unnoticed and unknown.. goodbye, my lover

soupy soup soupz

The 2 chocolate wafer bars made me feel extremely cloyed.. I had to scrape off that taste from my tongue with something, a food... something sourish but not too overwhelming...twas the moment when i developed a sudden craving for tomato soup. Sweet and tangy with bits of vege floating around...

Henceforth within minutes... Chop chop chop.... everything was dumped into my beloved auto-pilot cooking pot. Some stir-frying and boiling later, that appetizing tomato-ish smell wafted from the kitchen into my bedroom. I went and took a look. *taps finger on table* Something seems to be missing... something substantial, something chewy. Ahhhh... there it is. That's when I threw in some elbow pasta to boil. Unfortunately, clumsy spunkz accidentally put in too much of the elbow pasta. oops. hehe. After waiting for the pasta to cook al dente, I stirred in some cheddar cheese for that salty ooomph and to diminish the tartness before dishing out the bounty.

Chewy fat elbow pasta and chunky greens swimming in glorious tomato soup never looked better at this moment... *twinkles*

I can get weary.. I have emotions as well. I'm a person who does not have a strong capability to drive away my sadness, and think of happy things all the time. It may be easy to apply on one person but not necessarily on another. Departure is naturally associated with gloom. Am I really so wrong to think that way? Can't I just express my feelings just for some moments without being asked to be happy, happy and still be happy? If the sad feelings can't sink in, how am i to stabilize myself and feel happy? All i know is I'm sad... i feel being pushed away everytime the "stay happy" phrase pops up. It makes me even more afraid to come near you. It also makes me feel that I can't keep up with your pace anymore.. I have a pressure of having to match up with an unseen criteria which I have no idea is drawn up by my own heart out of fear or by something else..

emo

Tell me what to be done so I can work in peace..... It is impossible to discuss everything when there are no guidelines and you don't want to divide the work and insist on doing together.

I am so eff you see kay yee dee you pee by this tiny thing. Arrgh...

Rubbish!

Food Tech report is due on Monday. It wasn't so intimidating initially. Not after it'll be marked by Rosalyn. Please imagine our horror. For the unknown, she is THE Dictator. Yes, the Dictator loves to pick on the slightest details. I'll bet she can even sniff from our butts what we ate for breakfast yesterday. Her piercing gaze can give you the chills. You would not like to look at her for too long for fear of being turned into stone like Medusa. And her shrill voice is feared to possess the power of the shrieking mandrake, the power to kill .... *gasp*

Or maybe I exaggerated.

Food Engineering assignment is due on the 25th this month, which means next Wednesday. *palpitates* The test's gonna be on Friday. (o.O) *cold sweat*

Life certainly is "colourful",eh?

I whooped in joy when Miss Tan gave us a day off next Wednesday. Said she's ahead of schedule. Stickx looked at me and said: "That means Finals coming laaaa...."

Ooooh, I see..

Finals will start on the 17th next month. Followed by 20th, 21st and 22nd. It's the repeat of last sem's schedule, 3 papers back-to-back again. You're gonna see many frayed nerves spilling, zombiefied insomniacs mumbling to themselves, psychopaths glaring at you, power-gel guzzling humans trying to keep awake and lunatic bunnies hopping around. Of course there's always The One, who sleeps promptly at 10. And aces the papers. Because there is always extra time... for The One.

Ain't my uni fun???

Beached whale

The sky is overcast with angry rain clouds. Ready to unleash their powers at the slightest command from their master.

I feel huge. Because my tummy's bloated. Like a beached whale. Like the one shown in the papers today. Ughh. No, I don't dislike whales. Whales are lovely creatures. I'm just making a comparison.

Conclusion: I feel fugly. ouch.

Midnight durian excursion

Sharp at 12 in the witching hour, babibu gently prodded me and woke me up. "Time to go, daddy's waiting for us." Bleary-eyed, I shuffled my feet and somehow managed to drag myself into the car, still drowsy. The soft purring of the engine lulled me to sleep again. In between I overheard snippets of conversation discussing our destination. Pandan Jaya it will be.

The journey took less than 10 minutes. I awoke upon reaching. There were 2 durian stalls sandwiching a mamak stall in an open car park space. The durian experts (me excluded) decided to go for the stall on the right. Having durians in the middle of the night between sips of scalding teh-o halia and kopi-o was definitely new to me.

One is me being not a big durian eater, and two is the nocturnal eating of the prickly fruit. Still, I ate the most durians I've ever eaten for the past couple of years. Usually, I will never get past 2 kepal. The most also 3. Today is definitely a worth-mentioning achievement because I ingested more than that. *pat on the back* Aside from that, the atmosphere there was a soothing one amidst gentle breezes and the faint chatterings of patrons. We all enjoyed it thoroughly.

Overall, the four of us polished off almost 5 kg of durians. That was excluding the 1-2 kg of durians he gave us for free because got ulat. Hee. The total bill came to around RM 30, which would mean that 1 kg is around RM6. Not a bad price for the savouring of the King of Fruits, I guess. Chief said her Mum bought 1 kg at RM 8. Ours was a steal then. Still, durian prices are slightly higher this year due to the rainy season.

I remembered back at kampung 1 or 2 years ago, durians were going as cheap as RM0.50 per kg because of over-production. Some durian sellers would rather gave us their durians for free rather than peddling them. We were a lucky bunch then. My house almost had a never-ending supply of durians every week, thanks to my highly net-worked Father.

They came in gunny sacks, I'm not kidding you. Mangosteen and rambutans were also going cheap. I lugged back a big bag of mangosteen and rambutan from Johor to Kay-El for babibu. Too bad I was taking a bus. If not, I would have lugged back all the durians I could knowing how much Auntie, Uncle and babibu adores them.

Verdict: Long-awaited and long put-off midnight durian excursion, success~

Leaf, Tree & Wind

"Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay."

Happiness came to me once,
Tree, never asked me to stay.
I left.

Wind came to me,

Traverse do we across the plains.

I smiled.

Happiness eluded me once,

I let Leaf go.

I cried.

For one more day.
For one more chance.

For me.

If only Time, could just turn back.

Wind would not be Leaf,

And Leaf would not be Tree.

Dedicated to Wind,

who blew Leaf away,

whom Leaf never asked to stay.

And Wind, became a Leaf.

And Leaf became a Tree.

Worlds apart.

A new Wind has since blown.

Tree will be Leaf again.

Let us soar...

I got the saying from someone's website. The rest are just something I put into words from my heart.

Merry stew bubbling away~

FOREPLAY

spunky's note of thanks to yukiko, you are truly a great friend. spunky very happy for our 16 year old friendship. you care a lot. i very touched. i [heartx] you.

EROTIC STIMULATION

My stew is bubbling away merrily on the stove... After the presentation, I feeling very da lost. I stammered dan stumble a lot during presentation. Aih, dahlah tak perform ok.. 1st question ok only, the rest kapal tenggelam macam Titanic. My Titanic no survivor, Kate Winslet oso mati. Leonardo tak sempat save her. Ish.. ish.. ish...

Jalan-jalan balik house that time, don't know when i reach Giant also. The grocery shopping hit the spot sia... I stocked up on plenty of greens. My tummy bulat giler lately, must start jaga badan dy la. I must say, carrying 2 bags of groceries (almost few kilos got wey) and carrying my berat macam batu gergasi sling bag while huffing and puffing up the hill is hefty workout. My shoulders feels so sore now. waaaa.... hope the sores are worth it, make sure it burns hundreds of calories!!muahaha.... wiggy! I know I'm dreaming..... beee-cause Dumbo also knows its impossible la..

Sampai tingkat 21, nampak Daniel "Tai Chek Lou" (not to be confused with Daniel Bass Player). Good natured fellow offered makcik tua ni to carry my enormous grocery bags. But makcik has her pride juga. Setakat ni, masih boleh handle.. Ahemz..

Nywayz, Dan said Jess (da natural beauty... droolz~) found an apartment in Block A. High possibility she will pindah. spunkz sedih for a moment. Cannot bump into her so often anymore. Cleaner meenachi sure happy. Tak payah mop my drool so often. allarr... Cannot play with Daniel boy's tummy yang lebih bulat dariku so often anymore.. cis bedebah

I sad. Present no good. So cook stew. Wanna see how my stewed brains look like. But the stew too sexy. Can't be my mush. Cooking, I happy a bit. Coz i throw all the sayur in.

THE VULGAR STEW

I took off the poe-taa-toe's baju,

and tweaked the baby toe-maa-toe.

I banged some garlics,

and got turned on by the pungent onion.

I caressed the courgette under running water,

before my kinky knife licked her to pieces.

The mushrooms wanted a 3-some,

so i ajak them to the stew bath together.

The cabbage wanted S-M,

so i chopped her into sexy squares,

before dunkin her into hot oil.

She moaned n said she wants to be the sado,

but too bad i no like become the maso,

N biatch, hear ye i tak partial to lesbo..

She pleaded n stripped n asked to be whipped.

I tak tahan n killed her with my baby carrot stick.

The red tomato paste fills my bath-tub,

where she lies dead but still so sexed up.

THE END

If I don't get an orgasm when I taste the stew later, I think I'm pretty stewed. The above material are just mindless ramblings. Please do not take me so seriously. I do not mind girls actually. Come come.. throw all your kenyal cam getah tushies at me. I'm a tush person, no boobies please. Too silicone for my liking. And I like my milk from the moo-moos. So shoo. Go eat grass. Maybe after that I might glance at you. And pls korek your telinga & hear properly, I said MAYBE onie... you dickhead or conehead or watsoever shite-head.

I spout Melayu non-stop dari tadi. Why? Why? wHY? i know of someone who spouts English when the person's feeling guilty and confused. Darn, so what about me??? I spout Melayu when I...... cook stew?? Soooooo.... pa-the-tic..


Chronicles of the wiggy-ciggie-yearning-but-pocket-no-money-strega

Wishing you're by my side.. so I'll be braver to face all these..

Courage bestowed, my hand in yours.
Hearts entwined, no distance too far.
Steadfast holding, the strings that bond.
Silence withheld, a whisper so dear.

Shedding tears of gladness now that Physio II assignment is finally completed... I'm so tired.. still, saving the wee bit of fighting spirit left for slides editting and final preparation tonight before the battle begins tomorrow...

"Haiyaso~ Kuyaso~ Haiyaso~ Kuyaso~"

Curry-cooking oba-san, I'll do my best to keep up with your slow & steady pace.

Mocha Walnut

I have a new puppy plushie. And i named It Mocha Walnut. Why the name ah? Well, its colour is exactly like Secret Recipe's Mocha Walnut slice. And the tiny furball is round like a walnut. Tee hee hee.. =p Hey Blue, I still love you. Mocha is just an additional lil boy to our family.. just like Brownie, Cheesecake and Rootbeer. :)

Hmmm... It's been raining the whole day. The cemetry from my window's view opposite the highway is overgrown with browning shrubs.. They need trimming. Now it looks like a piece of land with dried up grass in unsightly patches.. :( And you expect those poor souls to rest in peace?? Over my dea.... ermmm nuts!

Busy.. busy.. busy... gotta get back to work. Sigh. I so hate my life now. Take me away, someone. .

happy kukhoo day, my love.. your absence is deeply felt.. I looked out of my window into the dreamy and surreal looking skies, painted by soft pastel yellow and marshmallow pink.. lined by streaks of white clouds.. set into the lightest blue imaginable.. at the very instant, i wished i'm in your arms, nuzzling against your chest.. taking in your very scent.. you bent down and looked at me in the eyes..with a faint smile, gently kissing me on the lips.... whispering 'I love you'.....

Mushroom tempura~

I'm snacking on mushroom tempura and...... blogging at the same time. Lovely brunch, not too heavy nor too light~ Cooking really is my anti-depressant sometimes aside from blogging. Any frustrations will be flung far far away once i start getting my hands dirty. I remember i used to love observing either grandma, aunt or my mum cook in the kitchen. Natural inquisitiveness plus itchy meddling hands will guarantee me a scolding from them when i disrupt their tempo by stirring their magic conconctions while they're unaware till caught red-handed.

Before I started working at S.K., i was usually bothered by the spattering of oil during the frying process. Nonetheless, my working experience there have erased all that. Just few weeks ago, I literally fried my thumb in the hot oil for almost 5-8 seconds without realising it. Mummy prodded me and woke me up to my senses. Hehe.. I miss her so much. Missed her phone call last night coz I was asleep. Frying my fingers is no longer a phenomenal occurence to me. I did that a few times at S.K. and got innumerous scoldings and laughings from my dearest colleagues. They also taught me how to reduce the pain and prevent scars, by dipping the finger into the batter till it's soothed. How i miss their laughter and jokes now. They had the most friendly demeanour I'd ever seen.

I was most probably one of the blurrest noob in S.K. last time. My colleagues used to lecture me about the importance of personal safety, moreover for a girl. Still, I went around cutting myself everyday (not on purpose) while de-skinning salmon slabs, shredding cucumbers and grating ginger and radish. By the end of my first week there, 9 out of 10 of my fingers were bound by plasters. Ever been scalded by rice-cooker steam before? This noob did. Ever sprained your wrist carrying dunno how many bags of rice a day for cooking? Don't worry, it's all in this noob. :) Reflecting back, that was probably one of the few unforgettable periods of my life. I learned, toiled, shed tears and blood, had utmost fun and earned valuable experiences in management, interpersonal as well as culinary skills.

Even though I'm frustrated lately, I'm tired of ranting and it certainly doesn't reflect good on me either. I do not want to come across as a person who loves to complain about every little thing. Thus, I'm doing my best to put an end to all the rants and raves that I'd usually post on the blog. Choices have their consequences. I'm frustrated also because of the results of my own actions of procrastinating and putting off work. So why should I rant? :) Nah, I ain't a perfectionist. I know I'm a human just like anyone else. There are times when I stumble but that's also where I learn. I have cut myself a lot of slack and I yearn to do better sometimes, like now. Doing what I feel is right and having no regrets are the few principles that can make my life better. As Prakash's blog boldly decrees, "Happiness is a choice".

Facts about petai i didn't know

Petai contains three natural sugars -sucrose, fructose and glucose - combined with fiber, petai gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy. Research has proved that just two servings of petai provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder petai is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes. But energy isn't the only way petai can help us keep fit. It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.

• *Depression: * According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND among people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating petai. This is because petai contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier.
• *PMS(premenstrual syndrome): * Forget the pills - eat petai. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.
• *Anemia: * High in iron, petai can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.
• *Blood Pressure:* This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it the perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the petai industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke.
• *Brain Power*: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school were helped through their exams this year by eating petai at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.
• *Constipation : * High in fiber, including petai in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives.
• *Hangovers: * One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a petai milkshake, sweetened with honey. The petai calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.
• *Heartburn: * Petai has a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating petai for soothing relief.
• *Morning Sickness*: Snacking on petai between meals helps to keep blood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.
• *Mosquito bites*: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of the petai skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.
• *Nerves: * Petai is high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.
• *Overweight: * Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and crisps. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady.
• *Ulcers: * Petai is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases. It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.
• *Temperature control *: Many other cultures see petai as a "cooling" fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In hoiland, for example, pregnant women eat petai to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.
• *Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) : * Petai can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer, tryptophan.
• *Smoking: * Petai can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassium and magnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.
• *Stress:* Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassium levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium petai snack.
• *Strokes: * According to research in "The New England Journal of Medicine, " eating petai as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%"
• *Warts: * Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of petai and place it on the wart. Carefully hold the petai in place with a plaster or surgical tape!

So, you see, petai really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrates, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around. So maybe its time to change that well-known phrase so that we say, "A Petai a day keeps the doctor away"

I got the above article from babibu. some i know, some i really dunno.. i strreesss giler now, so posting random article that is wholesome food for anyone who reads this blog's brains.... more updates later.

Yammy-licious afternoon

I had honourable guests over my crummy lil bedroom today, Kaz the sex-aye and Chief of Teh Banglas. We feted ourselves with yummy-licious taro a.k.a yam ice cream courtesy of our sex-aye-licious Kaz. (Arigato-gozaimasu!~ ^-^ ) Spoonfuls of ice-cream laters, Teh Chief proudly declared that she has always loved the potato family! Guess Teh Chief got brain-freezed, that's why she came out with teh yam --> potato family thingmajig which was corrected in due time by Kaz as tiuuu-berrr, not poe-taa-toe laaaa....

Perhaps certain compounds in the yammy-licious ice-cream triggered the histamine agents from basophils in Teh Chief's blood leading to an allergic reaction in teh Bangla-infested brain. Fuuyoh, lucky no aneurysm detected laahhh... Now do I sound like our macha Mr Veerapan's intellectual son who just can't live without his magenta highlighters? *triple lolx* It took us quite a bit of effort to stifle back our horrendous laughter from this blooper. =P Sorry chief, spunkz just couldn't resist regurgitating this darn love-laaaye (spoken with a drawl...) joke of Da century.

In true Malaysian spirit, we spent the whole afternoon duduk-duduk dan sembang-sembang till the cows came home...

Moooo~

I am cow,

Hear me moo,

I weigh twice as much as you,

And I look good on the barbecuuuuuuue~

(...... to be continued when scattered-brain spunkz recalls the rest of the lyrics)

*chucklez*

Hmm.. our topics ranged from politics (ahem.. we not that "sallow" okay..) involving a fraction of our earth-princes' incredulous antics which at times do rile us up to recent happenings around us.

Yam ice-cream, the ultimate relaxant & comfort food to let your hair down. Try it today and you will see!

Ooch, need to catch some forty winks and de-filth my body from all the grease I've collected today at the uni cafe. So laters~

He's leaving on a...train (not a jet plane, Dido)

Baby boo's leaving tonight. Will be taking a coach on Keretapi Tanah Melayu (KTM) to Singapore at 10.. it's a MTF-ing 10 hours ++ ride to Temasik. The return journey's only 7 hours ++, that is if AKLTG is not extending his stay for the school division training. If they do, he'll most probably be there on week days and will only come back on weekends for Success Coaching Programme (SCP) classes. And I've no idea how long that's gonna take.. So, any wo-man wanna date me? *lolx* Additional note: Gonna miss ya lots, buang boy.. and I've started already..

Tsssk.... As if I've the time for philandering around... I'm just about to be buried alive in work. *gasping for air* Still, staying in a positive frame of mind (plus cups & cups of coffee!!!) do keep me well above my neck.. though I was at the brink of losing my head for a couple of times due to the annoying Microsoft Power Point programme (I'm a novice at it (-_-) ). *grrrrrhh*

I doubt there will be anyone else attending the presentation except for the grading lecturers and of course, Swishy Hair. Speaking about her, she did not let us know about the Quantitative Descriptive Analysis talk today till Kae Shin called her. Poor lass rushed all the way to uni at the last minute while furiously calling me up. Sweet of her but too late, i was already in PJ at that time. Sucks wey, Swishy Hair.. should have informed us earlier.

Back to the topic of the slides, I shall let you have a sneak preview of the COCK i put on the slide to stimulate the lecturers interest.. *winx*

Why the disappointed face? Watcha thinking of? I meant a cockerel la, macha... Aiyoyo~

P/S: It's the coffee, dey... it's the coffee... it's getting me haywire.. (@_@) check out da MoFo eyes.... *cackles*

Prioritise and Focus

Few days of scampering around all corners of Kay-El have left me a little out of breath and out of steam to pick up where I left off in my university tasks. I strongly feel the need to prioritise and set a pace to start the work flow now before everything starts piling up and suddenly goes "Wham!!" on me.

An unmentioned resolution made in my heart is having no regrets in anything I do.. Life's short and unpredictable, living it to the fullest is the only way to justify it. That's why I believe there are other things in life which are more important than just studies alone. I might not have been paying much attention to my work these few days but it doesn't mean that I'm not in the least bothered about them. It constantly bugs me no matter where I go and what I do.

Still, I have no regrets at all doing what I've done for the past few days. Bonds have strengthened, feelings rekindled, friendship grown.. these are some satisfactions in life which can't be granted by studies alone.

For now, it's time to find my way back to the path where I've strayed away from. :) Thesis is my first priority followed by physiology and food engineering assignment. Attention!! I can and I must!

Motivation of the day: "Focus on My Outcome!"

I love you very much

My [he]artwork at Free and Easy

Shisha at Suzi's

Reeking of shisha smoke courtesy of Haji and Ron. Coke, lemon, lime and mint flavour to be exact. I've no intention of dragging myself off to shower at this ungodly hour. The smell can stay for all I care.. not that it sickens me. It's very bearable and shisha-ish.. (it means nice la,dey..) It's a wonder I'm still awake after the witching hours.. the fact is i just got home around almost 2 in the morning. I'd give anything to fall into deep sleep now though but my brain's awfully awake. What great timing huh.. Still, feeling slightly more relieved now that I've got a heavy weight off my chest tonight...

Thank you for being so patient with me all these years.

legend..

Robbie des is dope wey.. Leaves me in stitches each time i browse his page. I don't mind having him as a friend. Freakin cool and original shite he makes. he's an inspiration. Makes me wanna create my own legend too.. Nothing is impossible. :)

Details !

Happy bunny

I like to be the happy bunny at times...

if it means brightening up someone's day :)

tut tut tut tut tut tut tuut~

happy bunny on the loose...

She's not as cold as she seems;
the horse's mouth never opened,
that's why she lets it be.
It wasn't in her wishes,
that her absence was felt.
Though the slender hand got the brunt
to vent the frustrations of the past,
knowing doth she that it takes 2 to clap,
thus the grudge was never nursed for long.
If there was anything to blame,
the thicker hand was to partake in it too.
She is but a mortal of the mundane world,
when weariness can also weigh her down;
Delving into the nook of quills qnd ink,
baring her soul so the pain will cease..

spunkz

心声。。

感觉不一样了，
不在像以前那么单纯，
那么简单，
作什么都得顾禄多一些。
有时候真的好累好累，
也害怕未来对我们隐藏的秘密，
但我真的不想放弃。。。

Minutes of silence..

Observing a few moments of silence for a friend

who has lost her dearest kin,

her mother...

My heart goes out to you on your loss..

These are some of the times when we realise how fortunate we are to still have our mothers and loved ones by our side. Cherishing them shouldn't be done on special occasions only or on sad occasions like this..right?

Why don't we start doing it everyday if it hasn't been done yet? It's not that difficult to begin... a hug, a kiss or just a simple "I love you" will suffice. Do it and you will know it does make a difference.. it touches the soul and leaves a deep imprint in those whom we love.. Aren't these what we live for? Little acts of love that will warm the heart and nourish the tired soul..

I know of a person who constantly tells his loved ones that he loves them everyday.. and as much as possible.. To that person out there, I salute you for it..

Hurricane recount

*blink blink*

1st question: Hmm.. looks relatively simple. *Scribble scribble....*

2nd question: Ooch... i know this!! i know this! Wait! I forgot again! *Jots feebly*

3rd question: Damn... I got the factors from the various chapters mixed up. Now which should I write? *contemplates*

4th question: hey, I remember the formula. (^-^) (Minutes later....) Hmm... how come I can't apply it?? *grabs hair in frustration*

5th question: I'm positive I read it before. I remembered the facts... Stay calm... stay calm.. but not to the extent of which element is responsible for which properties. *knitted eyebrows*

6th question: *blink blink* The evaporator diagram I managed to muck around.. the calculations got me befuddled again... Blank.

7th question: Okay. I know the name of that monster. I think I can crap pretty convincingly with the help of those labled diagrams... I hope. *gulp*

8th question: Ahh... my saviour. I'll be rewarded marks for my graph right??? She's giving pretty hefty marks for this bloody Q. I'm stumped by the calculations again.. *total misery*

*blink blink*

Twas the day when the hurricane came,
swooped from above,
and got me creamed..
so terrifying was the monstrous glob,
that it muffled my shouts and drowned my dreams..

Ain't no breeze, baby.. It was a hurricane..

At long last..

At long last, I got my own internet connection at home. Right after I got my fridge last week too. I don't think I could ask for more. Okay, I'm exaggerating but hey I'm really grateful for all these little blessings in life.

Lately, I've been inundated by a brooding sense of foreboding fear.. It's senseless and at the same time makes me grapple between what are truths and untruths.. Still, what good will there be in thinking so much? I'll only end up being baffled and afraid.. like now.

I know I must focus more on my outcome when life gets shaky. And I shall do just that.

As for the case tomorrow, either I know or I don't know. Simple as that. No point getting all fuzzy brained over those nerve-wracking calculations..

spunkz, chant the mantra... "Food Engineering's gonna be a breeze tomorrow..."

And i dearly hope so with all my life!

Even superwoman has her vulnerable moments...

I'm finding grocery shopping and cooking therapeutic.. Maybe I'm turning out to be a typical oba-san but I'm not giving it a damn. I whipped up a vegetarian pizza today. Vegetarian food shouldn't be boring. Cooking is easy-peasy only when your kitchen is functional. God knows how much I spent to make mine work.. But, I'm telling myself: It's worth it. Every single piece of it.

Since i've been given an ultimatum to prohibit from smoking, it's just as well. Tinkering with food gives me a channel to unleash the excess energy bottled inside me. I couldn't psycho myself to use it on my uni work, might as well channel it onto something less harmful than lets say, smoking? I should be on the right track, I know.

Points to ponder.. Are there no intermediaries between a yes and no? Does a but really overturns everything?

spunkz to do list:

• trust
• love
• not to think so much
• start believing

I gave myself these expectations to live up to.. I hope I can really do it. You would say, talk is cheap. Do it. Show it. As I put all these down in words, I do wonder if you'll ever read any of it. . If you do, please lend me your support along the way.

To love is not easy but borrowing a phrase from Naruto: I'm just bad at giving up.

I love you.